Meet Jess...

The Warrior Campaign

Meet Jess...

𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕚𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕕 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕚𝕟 𝕕𝕠𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕤 ℂ𝕒𝕞𝕡𝕒𝕚𝕘𝕟?
I always knew I wanted to share our journey navigating the infertility world when the time was right. It tends to be a silent struggle for many couples so I only hope that by sharing our story it might offer comfort or support to others that may currently be facing the realities of infertility.

𝕂𝕚𝕟𝕕𝕝𝕪 𝕖𝕩𝕡𝕝𝕒𝕚𝕟 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 "𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪" 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕠𝕟𝕝𝕪 𝕡𝕝𝕒𝕔𝕖 𝕚𝕟𝕗𝕠𝕣𝕞𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 𝕙𝕖𝕣𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕒𝕣𝕖 𝕨𝕚𝕝𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕠 𝕤𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕖.
We started our journey 5 years ago. After a year of marriage we were ready to start trying for a family, completely naive to the idea of having any issues. Everyone around us was having kids and there were no real struggles for anyone in our families having kids that we knew of. After a year of no luck and no real reasons as to why this wasn't working I officially sought medical support from my OB. The words "well get you pregnant" were used more than once, so we were very hopeful. 4 failed medicated cycles later, we were referred to the infertility clinic.

In January of 2017 we had our first official appointment with the Infertility specialist. It felt surreal but we were hopeful this would be it. They did all the necessary testing to ensure no underlying issues on both of us prior to starting our treatment plan. We passed with flying colors and were diagnosis with "unexplained infertility". The worst set of words in this entire process.

I started all the necessary medications in preparation for our first IUI (Intrauterine insemination). Let me just add, for those not familiar with the infertility process, some of the medications they place you on can do a number on your hormones and can take you to crazy town without any warning. My husband was a pure saint thru this whole process! We had high hopes for this IUI. How could this not work, honestly. Unfortunately, we were once again unsuccessful. 3 more failed IUI's later and we were mentally shot.

No one prepares you for the mental, physical and emotional toll infertility takes on you and your spouse. The physical part is manageable, but the mental and emotional roller coaster is something straight out of hell. As a female your mind is constantly reacting to every twitch, cramp or even being a day late for your cycle.

Is this it?
Did it work?
Let me take another test just to be sure.

Over the course of this journey I've peed on more pregnancy tests and ovulation tests than I can count which just adds fuel to the fire. From your spouses perspective, they have to sit back and watch you go through procedure after procedure, reaction to the medications, crying from another failed cycle or crying just because you over cooked dinner because hormones are a bitch.

It is incredibly hard on both parties in different ways, all while trying to manage your marriage and continue to live a normal happy life in the process.

After our 4th failed IUI the doctor pulled us in to discuss changing our medication treatment with the next IUI and also address the options with IVF (In vitro fertilization). This was the one treatment I swore from day one I would never subject us too. I refused. I wanted nothing to do with it.

The next phase of medication with IUI would include injectables. I left that appointment in tears and finally admitted to my husband that I needed a break from this. We agreed a break was necessary and took some time off from the infertility world. Just because you stop treatments doesn't mean you stop trying. This was a constant topic in our minds, in hopes of some miracle to happen. During this time off I was seeing a nutritionist, had acupuncture, exercising consistently, we tried a variety of supplements and diet changes together in hopes this would support our end goal. Our break lasted longer than we had originally anticipated after an unexpected loss in our family.

By February of 2020 we started back up in our infertility journey with a new infertility clinic and new doctor. Again we were put through all the general testing to rule out any issues before starting treatment. During my HSG procedure (where they check for any blockages in your fallopian tubes) the doctor immediately identified I had PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome). This is where you can have enlarged ovaries with small cysts on the outer edges of them and can play a big role in infertility. We were shocked, relieved to finally have an answer but also incredibly frustrated wondering how this was missed before.

How much time, money and effort could have been avoided if this was caught sooner?

We allowed ourselves to be angry for a little bit but did not live in that head space for long. There was no point and we needed to focus on next steps. Our new doctor made it clear that the chances of IUI working would decrease with this diagnosis but he would do whatever we decided on. I again refused to accept IVF as our only option and we went through with one more IUI but agreed this would be our last attempt at one. We were so hopeful with a different medication plan, new clinic, new doctor that this would be it! Unfortunately we failed our 5th IUI as well. My fear of having to take the path down IVF was becoming very real. This was our only hope at having a baby. At the time our insurance did not offer IVF coverage so we had to wait for the new year to switch insurance. As the end of 2020 approached, our insurance shared benefit changes for the new year that would carve in 3 full IVF cycles. This was it. I couldn't back out now.

As 2021 kicked off I scheduled our consult with the doctor to discuss the IVF process. Again, we were assured that he would get us pregnant within a few months. In March we started genetic testing on us both and instructions of how this process would look. By end of April I had started my medications and injections to prepare my body for egg retrieval. Knowing I would face majority of the physical struggles in this process, my husband wanted to be a part of the process as much as he possibly could so we split responsibilities. He drew the medication each night while I injected my stomach. This went on for almost 2 weeks in preparation for egg retrieval day. The bruising from injections, burning from the medication and puffiness you experience from the hormones was all a part of the process. Egg retrieval day came and I was incredibly nervous to say the least. You're placed in the most vulnerable position, with medical staff in the room, your legs strapped into padded stirrups and knocked out during the 20-30 minute procedure.

They removed 20 eggs total which was a great number to start with (thanks PCOS). After the eggs were inseminated by the embryologist team we ended up with 6 embryos that survived up to 5 days prior to freezing. We were thrilled.

We waited about a month for my body to heal prior to our first transfer. By early June I was back on a new medication routine and 1 nightly intermuscular injection in the butt. Again, my husband continued his participation and support through the process and administered the nightly injection. We had our first transfer mid-June and were incredibly hopeful! All this work, this had to pay off.

Unfortunately, once again the dreaded phone call from the nurses came to advise my numbers were not high enough to be consider a pregnancy. We were crushed. It took some time for us to accept the negative results but started right back up to prep for another transfer. This time along with the same medication regimen as before, I was also started on a weekly IV treatment of Intralipids that had proven positive results. The medications and injections started along with the weekly IV treatment, bloodwork and ultrasounds to monitor everything. We had our 2nd transfer early July and then we waited the dreaded 11 days. We were hopeful but also optimistic after the last failure. We kept ourselves busy as best we could that week until bloodwork day arrived. 2hrs after my blood draw I received the dreaded but anticipated call from the office.

"Your numbers look great, you're pregnant".
My immediate response "I'm sorry, what did you just say??"
I couldn't believe it!
Theres no way, it actually worked?!

Focusing on work was borderline impossible the rest of the day while I waited for my husband to get home from work to tell him in person. We were over the freaking moon and in disbelief. As I type this we are now almost 12 weeks in and still in disbelief that this is really happening. We're hopeful for a continued healthy pregnancy and healthy babe in this next phase.

ℍ𝕠𝕨 𝕝𝕠𝕟𝕘 𝕕𝕚𝕕 𝕚𝕥 𝕥𝕒𝕜𝕖 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕥𝕠 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕔𝕙 𝕒 𝕙𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕡𝕝𝕒𝕔𝕖?
I don't know if I've fully reached a healing place just yet to be honest. Once you go through infertility its hard to sometimes let go of the emotional and physical roller coaster it's put you through. I will say that for the first few years in our journey we kept our struggles very close knit, only sharing with a few close friends and some family. When we reached the stage of IVF we decided not to keep it a secret any more. We were very open about the steps we were taking with all our friends and family. Once we let go of that "need" to keep it private, it helped us to share our story and also connected us with others whom had faced infertility that we had no clue about.

𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕠𝕣 𝕨𝕙𝕠 𝕙𝕖𝕝𝕡𝕖𝕕 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕙𝕖𝕒𝕝 𝕒𝕝𝕠𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕨𝕒𝕪? 𝔸𝕟𝕕 𝕙𝕠𝕨?
My husband, our family and friends. Also the friends who also faced some form of infertility. Theres a different level of support and understanding you share with those that have been in your shoes.

𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕚𝕤 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕝𝕖 𝕞𝕠𝕤𝕥 𝕚𝕞𝕡𝕠𝕣𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕥 𝕝𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕠𝕟 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕝𝕖𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕖𝕕 𝕗𝕣𝕠𝕞 𝕖𝕩𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕤 𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕕𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕡?
Every single persons story is different, especially in the infertility world. Every body is different, every struggle is different and everybody's way of coping is different. Don't underestimate your level of strength either. You might be surprised what you're capable of.

𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕚𝕤 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕓𝕖𝕤𝕥 𝕨𝕒𝕪 𝕥𝕠 𝕤𝕦𝕡𝕡𝕠𝕣𝕥 𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕖𝕠𝕟𝕖 𝕨𝕙𝕠 𝕚𝕤 𝕘𝕠𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕙𝕣𝕠𝕦𝕘𝕙 𝕒 𝕤𝕚𝕞𝕚𝕝𝕒𝕣 𝕤𝕚𝕥𝕦𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟?
Offer to be there as an emotional support for them. Simply just asking how someone is doing while in fertility treatments can mean all the world.

𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕚𝕤 𝕤𝕠𝕞𝕖𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕡𝕠𝕤𝕚𝕥𝕚𝕧𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕖𝕞𝕖𝕣𝕘𝕖𝕕 𝕒𝕤 𝕒 𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕦𝕝𝕥 𝕠𝕗 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕖𝕩𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕖?
The long awaited Baby Kingsley is due to arrive in March of 2022!! And a whole new level of respect for those embracing fertility treatments or that have gone through treatments